Youβre reading an excerpt of Stop Asking Questions, by Andrew Warner, a veteran podcast host of 2000+ episodes. The book explains how to lead high-impact interviews and learn anything from anyone. Master the craft of interviewing with this complete digital package. Purchase now for lifetime access to the book and extensive audio and video resources.
I thought heβd be livid.
After months of convincing an entrepreneur to come onto Mixergy for an interview, I spent much of the conversation interrupting him. Talk about a terrible host, right?
But I had to do it. He was going on and on and taking us off-track. I couldnβt let my listeners put up with that. So I interrupted himβquite a bit.
After the interview, I prepared for him to rip into me.
Instead, he said, βThanks for getting me back on track. Iβm not good at public speaking. I found myself droning on and didnβt know how to get back to my point. I can see why my friends like being interviewed by you. Youβre good.β
Interruptions are considered a cardinal sin of polite society. But when done right, they not only improve your conversationsβthey also make your counterpart look better in the process. When people struggle to get a point across, they start to talk in circles. Instead of clarifying, they make their point less clear with each round of explanations. Most people, like my interview guest, will appreciate your help sounding competent.
So how did I interrupt this entrepreneur without being rude or embarrassing him? I wasnβt exactly sure how I did it myself. So I examined the transcript.
Turns out, I stumbled upon a surprisingly simple solutionβa short phrase that exonerated me from any breach of conversation etiquette:
βIβm sorry to interrupt, but β¦β
Then Iβd complete the sentence by explaining why I was interrupting and often citing my higher purpose.
I donβt know where I learned this technique, but I used it for years without realizing it. Searching through my 2,100+ transcripts, I discovered more than 170 instances of me saying βIβm sorry to interrupt.β
Iβll refrain from calling out any particular entrepreneurs in this section. Instead, here are some examples to show you just how effective this magical little phrase can be:
Iβm sorry to interrupt, but I really want to get into the details of this.
Iβm sorry to interrupt, but [you said] βfanatical optimism.β How do you maintain fanatical optimism?
Iβm sorry to interrupt, but I really want to understand this concept because β¦
Iβm sorry to interrupt, but this is something that I need to learn from you β¦
Iβm sorry to interrupt, but I want to talk more in depth about that β¦
Donβt get me wrongβinterrupting someone does not feel natural to most people. It will make you feel rude and awkward at first. Youβre doing something every teacher and authority figure taught you not to do.
A βsorry to interruptβ moment is when you interrupt and share why youβre interrupting. People wonβt think youβre rudeβtheyβll think youβre considerate. If youβre interrupting for a meaningful reason, your guest will appreciate it.
Not every interruption is created equal. Saying βsorry to interrupt, but youβre boring meβ is extremely rude and will lose you a friend or colleague. On the other hand, βsorry to interrupt, but I really want to make sure I understand what youβre sayingβ is flattering and will win you a fan for life.
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π€ With Jeff Sawyer Lee: β$80M ARR by year two??!?β
π€ With Suuchi Ramesh: βHow Suuchi is turning small batch manufacturing into big revenue.β
A few years ago, I helped a few dozen members of my audience start interviewing. In a weekly meeting, one of them said, βI worry about not paying attention to my intervieweeβs answer and being stuck finding a way to respond.β Thatβs much more common than people realize because many interviewers edit those goofs out.
I was sweating when that happened to me in my interview with Mike Jones, an entrepreneur who sold his company to AOL. My audience, at the time, was limited to the small Los Angeles tech community, where everyone knew Mike as one of its most successful members. I felt pressure to get the interview right.